The Gift

Each of us has gifts. Those that we are born with. Perhaps some we cultivate over time. But everyone has something somewhere of which to be proud joyful individualistic appreciated.

Those for whom life or circumstances have not been so kind. Those who find themselves not feeling their best. Because they have been undervalued or beaten down in some way. Perhaps they have been told they are not worthy. Or they have been ignored neglected abused in some manner.

Some way that cuts to their very core. That intrudes their heart and flows through their blood. That becomes a piece of them. A way in which they define themselves or portray their being to others.

They carry that weight. Physical emotional intellectual spiritual. They wear it like a protective cape. Look no farther for there is nothing of substance to see here. Stay away. Keep your distance. I am not one to be adored admired befriended loved.

All of us know or are familiar with this essence that seeps out of pores and arrives ten feet prior to the actual arrival of the beating (beaten) heart.

But. However. Yet.

Hope.

The capacity to engage in a transformation. Transformative behavior that results in change positive impact.

Butterflies.

I have always referred to my daughters as butterflies. Macy is purple and Ella pink although they may debate these color choices now that they are older. I love watching them fly soar expand and grow wings. Take off into the unknown.

I have watched the transformation of my butterflies take shape in stages through time and experiences and loss and love.

I have experienced my own amazing radical life-altering changing shifting transformation.

To be loved for whom I am. To be appreciated respected valued.

For we may not know what we are capable of becoming. Until we find ourselves safely ensconced embraced in truth and love. Which all result in beauty. All things and beings become lovely when one feels inhales breathes love. Finds their personal truth. Loves themselves.

Some of us spend longer periods of time in our cocoons. Holed up. Recognizing that the elements or the environment is not yet safe for our emergence. Some of us find cracks but stay stuck inside. And sometimes we may need help in identifying claiming our escape.

To be witness observer share in another’s beautiful transformation. To know feel watch a being emerge and feel the lightness of being alive and valued. This is a true gift.

I am honored and humbled daily to share in the lives of our daughters and observe their transformations. The shift in winds and their reactions responses. The changing environments and patterns of behavior. The joy of discovery and growth.

And sometimes, I get to also share in the experience of transformation for another being.

We have a new foster dog this week. He came to us a matted mess but so chill and kind. Unable to see past through between strands of hair. But always at my side.

Yesterday he spent a few hours with a groomer who was so very kind and gentle and cared for him as she removed all of his hair. Nothing could be saved as he had not been properly cared for in quite some time. She carefully bathed and treated his skin kindly to avoid future rashes and infections. She stayed in contact with us (via cell phone as all of us must maintain a social distance) and shared pictures and encouraging words.

We shared with her that this dog was our 88^th foster and definitely in our top ten list. He has been fabulous with all creatures and people.

He was returned physically lighter. But the bounce shine in his eyes prancing dancing uncontrollable giddiness relief delight joy. That compelled him to run to the toy box (he could now see it) and leap over and up outside steps. To jump onto our bed and be touched. Oh to be touched and scratched and loved. To wait at the door of the shower with a ball and look into my eyes and know he is safe and loved.

Such happiness. So much that 24 hours later, looking at him watching him, walking in the yard while he runs, makes me smile tremendously. His excitement is contagious. I beam like a proud parent watching him grow into the being he was always meant to be.

(Like he had a makeover and kicked that abusive ex to the curb and finished his degree and got his life back on track and is now fabulous beach bikini ready to take on the world and share his love. You get a tail wag whole body wiggle happy jiggle. And you get one. And you too.)

And this baby who gets along with everyone and loves all. But is most positively definitely a momma’s boy. This lovely safe healthy young man who is learning becoming identifying sharing his heart. I will spend more time with him over the next few days. Eventually I will write up his description and request that it be posted so that potential adopters might apply. And I will be ridiculously fanatically overprotective in the review of any/ all candidates who have been screened by another volunteer. All of these things I will do. Knowing that they move us closer to our goodbye. And with tears in my eyes and a bit of sadness in my heart. But with so very much joy for him and his forever family that more than compensates. I will watch him fly. Away from me. But towards the sun. So that he might find his individualistic special gifted place in the world.

Love always transforms

(Fuzzy picture of me & “Elmo” after my run yesterday. He was happy to see me)