Clarity
Have you ever had that one perfect moment. That multivariate dimensional fracture in time when a person says something so completely honestly true that encompasses all that is was and can be. That takes...
Category: Aging Parents
Choices
Yesterday. Opening my eyes. Adjusting to the day being Sunday. The first thought. Foremost in on my mind. Was my visit with my mom. Nausea immediately overtook me. It had been maybe three weeks....
Always beneath
We took a weekend finally. To get out of town. Out of our heads. Out of this strangeness weirdness of Pandemic Quarantine. To refresh. Dust off the cobwebs. Stimulate our senses. We visited our...
The In-between
For people dying. Those on the precipice of living. Not quite alive. Unable to interact. No affect. Breathing still but perhaps barely. Or labored. Or something not quite right. Not quite. Not right. Only...
Mom’s Final Wishes
Yesterday evening, as the sun was setting, I chose to open one last file of papers to end another day of sorting through the vast accumulation of stuff that my mother gathered over the...
Clutched hands
(Originally written on September 11, 2020 but delayed publication because life…) Voraciously, she eyes the milkshake. It is known. Familiar. Her clutched hands reach out to try to grasp it. Fingers curled in on...
Thoughtfulness
Friday, March 13th. Until 12:30pm. Was the last time I was able to visit with my mom. Hold her hand. Look into her eyes. And see recognition. Know. In my bones. That she knew....
Holding my breath
Mom’s hospice nurse has checked in with us on a regular basis during this quarantine. We have also been receiving weekly updates from her community. And then. A few days ago. They announced that...
Underneath
Last night we were enjoying a most scrumptious meal of tuna via the Honolulu Fish Company. It was so lovely that I thanked the spirit of the fish that gave its life so we...
Mourning in stages
Those of us who have watched witnessed held vigil over a loved one dying. Are too familiar with the concept of mourning in stages. Chasing down symptoms. Settling on a prognosis. Doing anything everything...